Tip 243: Faith, Courage, Enthusiasm

"I will win! Because I have Faith, Courage and Enthusiasm!" That's the theme of the movie The Company Men starring Tommy Lee Jones and Ben Affleck, amidst corporate downsizing. The movie captures well the emotions of people affected by the volatile job market. It also explains why this volatility is happening - the need to grow the company rapidly to answer to shareholder's expectation of profits, the desire to own large buildings for reputation's sack and thereby render risk to change course should the business be not as buoyant.

It is sad that company drones work hard for the queen or kings of the corporation, yet risk losing their livelihood as there is lack of sense of loyalty to either parties. Is there then the need to not marry oneself to one's job? Is there a need to educate corporate owners to grow the company organically, instead of by leaps and bounds with disregard to the risk of downsizing? Has corporations in the wake of capitalism forget their core value and function which is to create goods and services for the community, by working with a good team of people that the corporation has chosen to nurture to build their potential for success? Or are companies in the business to create unnecessary ups and downs for the community and families.

Sadly, this is the reality of today's imperfect economic system. In the movie, GTX, a transport company begins to evaluate cutting all its unprofitable divisions, even its core business divisions when it started operations. The CEO salaried at $22 million even laid off his long time employee who together founded the business with him since they have differing views on downsizing. It's a cold message that friendship in the workplace nowadays mean nothing if it impedes profit.

Yet, in the final analysis, there is always a rainbow that awaits the patient. Rough times will come and go. Evil will always be judged. Help is always near to those who wait upon Him in faith, courage and enthusiasm. There is always something to learn from trials.














What matters more is not the forecast of profits or the attainment of success, but whether we have faith in goodness. Success will always come if we build our faith upon the right foundation. How awesome if we can have faith in the potential of people by motivating them to enjoy building a future together as a team. If it does not come, we still gain in learning to be content with the simple things in life such as the smiles of my lovely daughters. Or in the film, the valuable time in playing basketball with a lonely teenager son that yearns for his dad's company and mentoring. Everything happens for a reason and we can wait patiently for the revealing of God's Good Will.














In rough times, courage is the thin string that holds things together. Courage against giants, against ruthless and cold evil, against those who sneer and have lack of faith. Enthusiasm is the light humour that brings us through discouragement. There must be a new day with new blessings. Even if the tap runs dry of water, there is always a wealth of lessons to be learn each day. Light up our eyes so we can eagerly spot opportunities to grow, to love and to win.














I too have my fair share of ups and downs in all my workplaces. Yet, I echo the actor's call that there is nothing to lose if we chant "faith, courage, enthusiasm". We can only lose our job, but we will never lose our spirit. There is always good to those who seek after goodness, despite our failings and weaknesses.

Check out another blog I write: http://lifenewcreation.blogspot.sg/ to find about securing new opportunities for your future.















(Photos show Haruka with my mother in law during our search for a kindergarten where they had mochi making and eating, and family and relatives enjoying Indian lunch buffet at Riverwalk Tandoor, Singapore for SGD13 per person).

Tip 229: Lifestyle engineering for sustainability

What is a sustainable lifestyle? To me, a lifestyle that is sustainable is adaptable to different cultures, different income levels, different environments, so that for better or worse, for poorer or richer, we are able to live together joyfully. The things we have and the comforts we enjoy, ought not to condition the way we live such that the family falls apart when it faces a situation of poverty or war or sickness.














Yet, the family if given a choice will always yearn to live within its comfort zone. Hence, the need for a little engineering to create situations when we move out of the comfort zone. Quite a handful of jargon in this blogpost, enjoy.














I do not play God in determining the circumstances of my family. Yet, each of us make different choices in life. We switch channels on our remote control or decide what we wish to eat for the day. Do we constantly choose convenience, comfort, speed and material enjoyment all the time? Or do we sometimes choose that which is strenuous, uncomfortable, slow and simple? By adapting to different situations, do we grow better as a person? Or should we be spoilt with convenience and comfort, till we be obese couch potatoes choosing to live for ourselves alone?














It is actually not as complicated. It is as easy as choosing to walk or take the bus when you can conveniently flag a taxi. You may probably hear a few complaints from your wife and child in the beginning, but after a while, they see the value and fun in taking time exercising and begin to build their stamina towards a little hardship. Same goes for carrying and wearing your baby when you can use the stroller. Or delaying purchases and seeking good bargains and avoiding impulse buying all the time. There is a time for everything. Time for hardship and time to splurge and treat ourselves to some comfort. Yet, often we forget to schedule some slow time, some hardship and inconvenient time to make us better stronger people. The key is not making quick decisions for easy way out (unless you get free gifts or free help). Try out the hard way. Only when you have tried it and know your limits, you can consider other options in the decision making process. Then, aim for those limits again at another time. Surprisingly, it may find less resistance and be a breeze for the whole family then.

The bible in James 1:2-4 states, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything". It would be ideal for a family to not lack in anything and develop the necessary perseverance to sustain through time. Of course, God's grace be with us as we grow. And if we lack anything, may we remember to seek after Him for wisdom.

(Photos show Haruka at Singapore Universal Studio, a treat after bearing with daddy's whims and fancies :)

Tip 223: Trust and not Judge

All of us have our preconceived judgments on people, places and things. We sometimes hold on too tightly on the wisdom that life has taught us or the familiarity that lightens our anxiety.

There is truth that a square object would not fit a circular mould. Yet, our judgement is based on a 1 dimensional flat plain of a single time horizon and a particular environment and location. Life can bring lots of beautiful surprises, as our God has a good sense of humour.

Different seasons of life can change a person. New environments can bring the best out of a person and even change them for good permanently. A square ice can certainly not enter a circular mould. But, when the ice melts, it can surely fill any mould. We just need to withhold our judgement and trust in the goodness and beauty of a person. The perfect timing of God has much in store for good to happen when it is hoped for.

I used to have preconceived ideas about the different countries I will work at, even before I step foot on them. For instance, I had thought Tokyo was a dense, crowded and polluted city. My 4 years living there have changed my impression totally. I think Tokyo is an extraordinarily beautiful place which does not feel crowded at all if you know where to hang out. Based on that decision, I even bought a small apartment in the very center of Tokyo which is being rented out now.

I have also heard lots of exciting things about Hong Kong being a nice place to work in. I later found that it can be a gloomy place when the sun cannot penetrate the thick smog and the tall skyscrapers filling the skyline. It can get disorganized in some places when quick aggressive citizens push around in crowded areas and speak loudly and rudely, though this observation came from my wife and I have learnt to see it through her eyes.

This impression left me thinking that all of China is the same, yet I saw the most beautiful blue skies in Beijing when I was there for a week and was wondering where was all the pollution that I was expecting to see. There were lots of green in the large parks and lakes. Now that I am in Singapore, I have thought Singapore was a very orderly and law abiding city, yet there seem to be lots of necessary improvement before it can manage an ever increasing foreign population. Through all these experiences, I have learnt to be less quick to judge, but to maintain an open mind to marvel at what life can present to me.

Yet, what does it mean to trust? To trust is not to have any worries or fear, but patiently, lovingly and joyfully hold on to goodness and whatever God has in store for us.

To judge on the other hand is to rely on our wisdom and experience to decide on right or wrong and not let go of our feelings of shame, guilt, jealousy, fear, anger, unhappiness and doubt when making such judgements. It is never easy to hold on to a piece of square ice and wait for it to melt to fill the circular mould. Yet, if we insist of pushing the square ice into the mould, there will be lots of friction and pain. We may pray that God brings out the sun to melt the ice sooner, rather than later so the waiting can be shorter, yet it is His decision. We can only wait and why not spent it joyfully.

(Photos show the latest attraction in Singapore, Marina Bay Sands Skypark where I won a one night stay. The skyline of Singapore near the bay area is catching up with Hong Kong, and the view at the top is arguably better with clearer skies. Tomomi is in her 5th month pregnancy and Haruka is enjoying swimming and is not scared of heights, but probably annoyed by the Paparazzi).

Tip 194: To cherish or to dispose/demolish/retrench/divorce

I was cycling past a familiar landmark. It was previously the site of Citibank Shinjuku Minamiguchi along Koshukaido main road. But it has been demolished and a new building is under construction. It seems only yesterday that I was stepping into this bank to apply for my first Japanese credit card. It does not seem like a strong attachment, yet it feels like something is amiss in a familiar picture of my life. Would all this discontinuity in memories feed our values that it is alright to throw the old and bring in the new? Is society making decisions on what can be done faster, rather than taking time to mend the old, hold on to sentimental feelings and cherish the past? Does this explain more common practices of disposal vs. repair, demolishment vs. refurbishment, retrenchment vs. retraining, divorce vs. patience?












A scene in a Chinese movie The Road Home stays in my mind. The broken pieces of a bowl was not discarded, but was nailed together painstakingly and with care to form a bowl that can be used again. It is because the bowl represents memories. Memories of using it together with loved ones. Memories of having someone create it out of love and present it as a gift. Do we cherish such memories? How do we teach our children to cherish such memories? In the bible, God emphasizes the need to remember events in life. As we humans have limited memories, its good to learn to cherish them more, since we would later see the bigger picture and be appreciative of that which has past and learn from it.












Should we learn to treat objects with more respect and give them away rather than throw them into the garbage? Use internet groups to find people who would want items that can be reused if they are in fairly good condition. Another good practice that I see my wife doing (which I have yet to practice myself) is to wrap items nicely such as paper or plastic wrappers of chopsticks that we plan to dispose of before throwing them away. Would this lead to cherishing the old more? At least we demonstrate respect and dignity.












(Photo shows a 400 year old Japanese garden at the New Otani Hotel, Tokyo).

Tip 148: Seing the big picture of our days

The following is a beautiful Indonesian parable that has been going around in cyberspace through forwarded emails. I tried to find its source, but could not and realized it has yet to be translated. Maybe, this will be the first translated English version on the Internet. I happen to be on a reflective mode after watching August Rush, an inspiring movie and then found this Indonesian parable on Facebook. With a symphony of music playing inside me, it was a destined moment to be translating this beautiful parable. The power of this parable lies in its final words in Bahasa Indonesia as below:

"Jangan pernah menyesali hidup yang saat ini anda jalani sekalipun itu hanya untuk satu hari. Hari-hari yang baik memberikan kebahagiaan; hari-hari yang kurang baik memberi pengalaman; kedua-duanya memberi arti bagi kehidupan ini."

Do not ever regret this moment of your life that you are undergoing as it is but one day. The good days bring happiness. The less good days bring experience. Both brings meaning to this life.

My thoughts as a daddy here. If only we could step out of life like God to see each of the beautiful day of one's life played together as a rhapsody of music of high and low keys. If only we as daddies could step out of our busyness to see each day that has passed in our child's life - the growth, the learning, the joy, the meaning that has been created. That's life. It shouts with joy to its Creator for such a marvelous day created.

The parable of the bamboo and fern

One day, I decided to quit. To quit from my job, to quit from everyone, to quit from my spiritual journey. I went to the forest to speak with God for the final time.

"God", I spoke, "Give me one good reason not to quit."
His answer surprised me.
"Look around you", He said,"Do you see the ferns and the bamboos in this forest."

"Yes", I answered.

God said, "When I first planted them, I sowed the seeds evenly and cared for them with fairness. I gave them light and water. The ferns grew rapidly, and its green spread across the land. Nothing sprouted from the bamboo seed, but I did not stop caring for them."

"In the second year, the ferns grew even faster and in greater numbers. Yet, still nothing sprouted from the seed of the bamboo. But, I never gave up."

"In the third year, nothing sprouted still from the seed of the bamboo, yet I would not quit. Same goes for the fourth year."

"Then, in the fifth year, a tiny sprout emerged from the earth among the ferns. Compared to the fern, it looked seemingly small and insignificant. Yet, 6 months later, it grew and climbed to a height of more than 100 feet. In the initial 5 years, it was devoting its energy to establish its roots underground. The bamboo can only grow large and tall with a strong system of roots. I would not allow my creation any trials that it could not handle."

"Do you, my child, know that in all your trials, you were actually growing your roots. Just as I had never given up on the bamboo, so it is the same with you."
God continued,"Do not compare yourself with others. The bamboo's purpose is different from that of the fern, yet both contribute to making the forest look beautiful."

"Fear not, my child, your time will come.", God said to me,"You will grow with great height".

I asked,"God,how tall should I grow?".

God replied,"As tall as the bamboos could grow."

I asked,"As tall as they are capable to grow?".

"Yes.",He answered,"Glorify Me with your growth, as tall as you could rise."

I walked out of the forest renewed. I am reminded that God would never leave me. Neither would He give up on you.

Do not ever regret this moment of your life that you are undergoing as it is but one day. The good days bring happiness. The less good days bring experience. Both brings meaning to this life.

Read more about bamboo's growth here.

The original parable in Bahasa Indonesia is below. Remember, you are special. Reflect always and give thanks for everything.

Suatu Hari aku memutuskan untuk berhenti. Berhenti dari pekerjaanku, berhenti dari hubunganku dengan sesama dan berhenti dari spiritualitasku aku pergi ke hutan untuk bicara dengan Tuhan untuk yang terakhir kalinya. "Tuhan", kataku. "berikan aku satu alasan untuk tidak berhenti?"
Dia memberi jawaban yang mengejutkanku. "Lihat ke sekelilingmu", kataNya. "Apakah engkau memperhatikan tanaman pakis dan bambu yang ada dihutan ini?" "Ya", jawabku.
Lalu Tuhan berkata, "Ketika pertama kali Aku menanam mereka, Aku menanam dan merawat benih-benih mereka dengan seksama. Aku beri mereka cahaya, Aku beri mereka air, pakis-pakis itu tumbuh dengan sangat cepat warna hijaunya yang menawan menutupi tanah namun, tidak Ada yang terjadi dari benih bambu tapi Aku tidak berhenti merawatnya.
Dalam tahun kedua, pakis-pakis itu tumbuh lebih cepat Dan lebih banyak lagi. Namun, tetap tidak Ada yang terjadi dari benih bambu tetapi Aku tidak menyerah terhadapnya." "Dalam tahun ketiga tetap tidak Ada yang tumbuh dari benih bambu itu tapi Aku tetap tidak menyerah begitu juga dengan tahun ke empat. "
"Lalu pada tahun ke lima sebuah tunas yang kecil muncul dari dalam tanah bandingkan dengan pakis, itu kelihatan begitu kecil Dan sepertinya tidak berarti. Namun enam bulan kemudian, bambu ini tumbuh dengan mencapai ketinggian lebih dari 100 kaki. Dia membutuhkan waktu lima tahun untuk menumbuhkan akar-akarnya. Akar-akar itu membuat dia kuat dan memberikan apa yang dia butuhkan untuk bertahan. Aku tidak akan memberikan ciptaanku tantangan yang tidak bisa mereka tangani."
"Tahukan engkau anakKu, dari semua waktu pergumulanmu, sebenarnya engkau sedang menumbuhkan akar-akarmu? Aku tidak menyerah terhadap bambu itu Aku juga tidak akan pernah menyerah terhadapmu. "
Tuhan berkata "Jangan bandingkan dirimu dengan orang lain. Bambu-bambu itu memiliki tujuan yang berbeda dibandingkan dengan pakis tapi keduanya tetap membuat hutan ini menjadi lebih indah." "Saat mu akan tiba", Tuhan mengatakan itu kepadaku. "Engkau akan tumbuh sangat tinggi""Seberapa tinggi aku harus bertumbuh Tuhan?" tanyaku."Sampai seberapa tinggi bambu-bambu itu dapat tumbuh?" Tuhan balik bertanya."Setinggi yang mereka mampu?" Aku bertanya"Ya." jawabNya, "Muliakan Aku dengan pertumbuhan mu, setinggi yang engkau dapat capai."
Lalu aku pergi meninggalkan hutan itu, menyadari bahwa Allah tidak akan pernah menyerah terhadapku dan Dia juga tidak akan pernah menyerah terhadap Anda.
Jangan pernah menyesali hidup yang saat ini Anda jalani sekalipun itu hanya untuk satu hari. Hari-hari yang baik memberikan kebahagiaan; hari-hari yang kurang baik memberi pengalaman; kedua-duanya memberi arti bagi kehidupan ini.

Do leave comments if you are using this as a discussion and share any discussion questions that you think of. There are plenty of questions as we bring heads together to apply this parable. Let the seed of my effort and yours benefit others. Let this seed grow roots as we reflect on its application.

(Photos show the compounds of Les Invalides, Paris as well as Haruka at Green Park, London).

Tip 131: Smiling when the bowl is empty

Its such a joy to teach a young toddler and observe how she learns. A baby or toddler has the enthusiasm and desire to learn everything taught to her without question. With you or without you, the baby will be learning from the moment she is born and starts to take in her new surroundings. Every sight and sound will be part of her learning processs. I was just making a casual remark when Haruka finished a bowl of food. I said with a smile and by making the sign language of finish and saying, "Nai, Nai" (None in Japanese). I was impressed to observe later that Haruka does the same expressions everytime something is finished, instead of being unhappy about it, she has that positive outlook that she understands the concept and wants to let others know. My candid reaction and good mood earlier has done wonders to Haruka, as she repeats now this practice of smiling and expressing happiness when something is empty.












I reflected on this and recalled the tale of Goldlocks and the three bears. The story goes like this: The Bear family is just waking up. Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl. It's empty! "Who's been eating my porridge?" he squeaks. Papa Bear arrives at the table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl. It too is empty! "Who's been eating my porridge?" he roars.












I am glad now that my initial response was never close to the roar of Papa Bear. Haruka may later understand the concept of work and the need to replenish resources, but I hope she starts off with a positive outlook that there is still the ability to be thankful in every circumstances. Truly, even the ability to recognize the phenomenon that the bowl is empty and that there is an opportunity to fill it later is cause for joy. My previous post shared about the need to affirm good behavior in a baby to help the baby define happiness. Even in her yearnings, the baby can develop a sense of humor and embrace her surroundings better. All this is only made possible through lots of communication and teaching positive values through daddy and mummy's living examples. Truly, later Haruka will begin to choose to think for herself how she prefers to behave, but at least she has learnt one possible way to behave and think. She knows that there is now an option to smile, be contented and be patient till the next bowl of food arrives. Lets see how long this continues, and I will share on this as it helps me to reflect as well the beautiful lessons in life.












I know that by age 2-3, the toddler has more tantrums and may not easily smile because daddy is smiling. What are ways to calm her tantrums?












(Photos show more of Ocean Park including the dolphin show, the sea lions, the aviary, the scene from the cable car - all for a low discounted admission fee of HKD178/USD$23 per adult. Also, at Plaza Hollywood near to Diamond Hill station, Haruka posed with a fan of mine, the funny Maria Cordero or also known as Fat Mama Maria, who sings and stars in many Hong Kong films).