Tip 154: Recycling hazard

Japan is one of the top countries successful in its drive to reduce garbage waste and increase recyling. It is ranked the highest in the world for recycling plastic PET bottles. Its drive is linked partly to its desire of not wanting to utilize land fills for garbage to promote a more beautiful country, as well as to reduce the cost of incinerating its garbage. Though, a more admirable quality lies in many Japanese who love and respect the environment and feel a sense of pride when adhering to noble laws. Even, if it means sorting garbage every week into 10 categories such as burnable, non-burnable, small metals, plastics, batteries, used cloth, recyclable newspaper, recyclable glass, recyclable plastic and bulky refuse (that requires extra disposal fees). This humorous article even talks about a prefecture in Japan that has 44 categories of garbage!

I think recycling can turn into a compulsion, no different from some who find refuge in excessive hand washing. The very act of recycling may even incur more energy and bring detriment to the environment if for instance due to over-emphasis of washing recyclable goods. And how do these Japanese unlearn their recycling compulsion abroad? Hereby, my term recycling hazard, though not commonly used by others.

Tomomi by nature likes things neatly disposed of. Not all Japanese are as sophisticated as her, who would fold beautifully a chopstick, sweet or tissue wrapper before leaving it on the table of the restaurant, or home of the host who have invited us for dinner. I look forward to the day, to blog about Haruka folding her first wrapper. Its a form of respect and polite gesture to leave things beautifully disposed. No different from the signboard at scenic sights that say "take only photos/memories, leave only footprints".

Though, there is simply too much effort spend on recycling voluntarily as even not all Japanese bachelors would comply. When milk cartons are consumed, some Japanese like Tomomi, would cut it the way that it has been instructed, wash it, dry it and bring it to the nearest supermarket which has a bin placed by the manufacturer of the milk carton. She even does that in London before throwing it together with all the other waste. Then, she was worried if we should just use any bags to store the garbage, or whether there is a certain garbage bag used in London. Well, the answer is simple. Garbage are garbage everywhere else in the world. They get little respect and get dumped out of the home. Some apply for immigration status to enter Japan for the VIP treatment received.

Do you think an over emphasis on recycling with a code of thick laws are detrimental and pose a recycling hazard? Or is it good knowledge that the rest of the world need to emulate else, such ignorance is no different than other sin? Your different views are respected and welcomed here.

(Photos show Blenheim Palace at Oxfordshire, less than an hours drive from Oxford city).

Tip 153: Daddy bath time while it last

I blogged on bathing Haruka when she was around 3 months old and again when she was 6 months to a year old. Then, she was dependent on daddy's support while bathing her and to teach her to play in the bath tub.

After 1 year old, babies can most certainly sit in the bath tub by themselves. They are no longer fearful of being alone in the water. Daddies role then is to talk to her and keep her bath time exciting. But, this special time would not last forever, as the baby begin to develop their sense of space and independent play.

After 1 year old, I noticed Haruka enjoys talking and listening more than just mere playing. She observes different creative ways to play with the water. She enjoys me singing to her while bathing. She enjoys me talking to her. It is the best opportunity for daddy to build quality time to communicate.

I would ask Haruka, "how was your day today? Are you happy today?". Even if she does not answer, she understands. Later, as this is repeated regularly, she would nod when its a yes, and later, she even speaks about what she did in simple words. "Did you play with the babies? Are the babies clever and good today?". I always try to ask Haruka questions that she can say yes to or nod. This allows her to be happy to communicate as she can respond and knows that I understand her communication.

Though, whenever daddy is busy for a few days in a row, that bath time role can easily be lost. At an age where Haruka begins to like to play or do things her way, she would find the bath tub too crowded for 2 people. That is a sign that the child is growing. Now, I still have a chance to feed her and later drive her. But, I doubt she would stay a baby forever. Nor daddy's little girl.

Do you daddies still bath your kids? How old are they? Do you leave them to play after the initial scrub and cleaning?

(Photos show evidence of daddy spending time to bath Haruka (with his swimming trunks daily), and my last few photos of Paris at the Museum Carnavalet, Opera Garnier and the Obelisque).

Tip 152: Bean bags can be fun

Bean bags (or batu seremban as called in Malaysia or Otedama as called in Japan) can be played by even babies under 2 years old. The objective is not to have game rules but to have fun balancing and throwing the bean bags. As in all new toys, daddy need to be involved in showing how it is played. Sometimes, put in some sound effects since many words are still too complicated for under 2 year olds. Lots of laugh and clowning around helps to make the game interesting. Then, slowly creativity makes its way when the baby is used to the toy and explores it.

In Japan, it is only 3 bean bags instead of 5 as in Malaysia. I started playing the balancing game on my hand by trying not to let any fall on the floor, but to balance all 3 bean bags on my hand. Whenever, any of the bean bags fall, I would make a funny remark and expression on my face which kept Haruka in stitches. As I did it a few times, she understood the idea of balancing something on one's hand. She could not balance it on her small hands like I could, but its a soft object that is good for tossing. One day, while playing, she balanced it on her head and laughed whenever it dropped. What a good way to learn balancing and even to develop a sense of humour. This is a simple example of how simple objects can be fun to play with and yield creative lessons. No need to be shopping for the latest gadgets from Toys"R"Us. There will always be an opportunity to pamper our kids with expensive toys, once they go to school and start comparing toys with other kids. Rather, at an early age, time spent in playing together means more. The money on toys can all be saved.

Any other fun classic games for under 2 year olds? Please do share.

(Photos show the Seine river, the Pont Alexandre III bridge and Moulin Rouge, Paris).

Tip 151: Commanding your spirit aloud

I had the pleasure of listening to the Haydn & Mendelssohn Bicentenary Choral Concert in Tokyo presented by the British Embassy Choir and Orchestra. That was a luxury as babies are not allowed at concert and I am away from the helpful hands of family members. It was a pity that I missed all the musicals while in London. Hopefully, when the children are big enough to enjoy it, we can go together as family one day. The concert presented Felix Mendelssohn Bartholdy's Wie der Hirsch schreit (Psalm 42) among others. Through Mendelssohn's music, I could feel the loud commanding of David (of the bible) to his soul, to put his trust in God in Psalm 42:5. How very true that in all the melancholy, there needs to be the firm command and instruction to our soul to focus on 1 thing. Stop dwelling on the wrong thought and emotion. Instead, focus on God and trust Him. For through God, all praises and joy burst flow. Through God, salvation and help is present. At times, there needs to be a time to retreat into a solitary place to gain perspective. At other times, a mere habit of rebuking one's spirit to focus on the right thing.

David yearns for the days when he had the highest spiritual experience and God was using Him greatly to lead others on something important to God. He felt special and important then. He felt God was so close to him then. Success can sometimes be a double edged sword to make you wish for the best things in life that you had, but which you may not always get. Often times, God does not work on man's schedule and wants, but through His timing. When we do see the big picture later, we would understand why we should have been patient. Yet, before that time comes, melancholy could sip into the spirit. That's when a loud command to focus on the right thing is necessary. I look back and recall so many such melancholy at play. It could drag for long periods. The downcast spirit inside me makes me feel that I have done something wrong, such that I could not achieve the same greatness and same experience I had with God previously. Yet, the only thing I needed to do was just be content and trust in God for His timing. Rather, the downcast spirit many times would lead you to be impatient, and drift away on self pity which leads to possibilities of doing wrong things and giving up on God. Hence, before that happens, one needs to command aloud the spirit to trust in God.

Isn't this so true? Anyone have no periods of melancholy? Guys have it less as they head for arcade or computer games to focus not on heart matters, but I think that's just temporal.

(Photos show St Eustache church, Forum Les Halles, Gare Du Nord and Pl Des Victoires, Paris)

Tip 150: Instilling spontaneous kindness

I am currently in Tokyo for a holiday before starting my next assignment. Good chance for us earlier to stay in Okinawa, so the whole family could catch up with my in laws and for them to spend as much time as they want with Haruka, while me and Tomomi finally have our break time to be alone together. For a brief week, Tomomi stayed at Okinawa a while longer, while I had errands in Tokyo.

Went to church by myself and an interesting encounter got me reflecting on this blog post. It was raining and I just finished church service. Had a stroll in the drizzle which I wouldn't do with family. Though on clear days, a stroll down safe Japanese streets adorned with flowers is much more pleasant than the train ride. On a quiet street, a father and his son aged less than 10 years passed by me and asked me for directions if I knew where a particular badminton racquet shop was. He was holding a wet leaflet with the addrress and details of discounts available. I said I did not know where it was. But, I continued to tell him that I knew that the street we are at would unlikely have this shop. I told him he could walk accross to the other side where there was a large sports shopping complex. His son's eyes gleamed hoping his dad would give up and his dad gave a quick nod. His son thanked me. I continued walking and looked back. His dad was still searching the street signs.

I went ahead to window shop while a thought came to mind that I could actually had accompanied them to the large sports shopping complex and bought his son a racquet. It could be his first racquet. It could be more expensive without discounts, but I doubt they were eyeing the designer labels of the highest price tags. It must be stressful to support a family in Tokyo with a hard labourer's wages and want to give the best to your children. The materialistic kids these days would give the pressure of owning the best. They say if you want to win in sports, you have to have the best racquet, the best gear. If you want to get an A grade in art, you must have the best paint brush, best paintset. Poor daddy. Just wanting to see the gleaming pride of his son appreciating his dad's labour of love. I was back again at the same street to head home and was praying that the duo would be still there, but there were gone. Else, I could have mustered courage to offer kindness even if it was declined.

If only I had spontaneous kindness. I naturally have spontaneous lies. Spontaneous hands to grab free samples. Spontaneous eyes to see the curves. Spontaneous driving skills to maneuver a traffic jam. Spontaneous reflects to stop a snatch thief. Once a decade ago, on my first day of a part time job selling F1 tickets at the Malaysian Sepang International Circuit, a European customer commended me of my reflects when the customer before him tried to steal my cash at the ticket counter. I was swift to held it away even after a long day dealing with countless people and considering it was my first time selling tickets ever in my life. So why no spontaneous kindness? I am sure it comes with training. First, the need to blog to start a paradigm shift in my mind to have full resolve. Next, to start on many small acts of kindness of giving instead of always taking. I think quantity breeds quality. Though, for some, you could excel even if it was your first time.

There are so many small kindness that may be insignificant, yet makes this world a better place. Paying the toll fare for the car behind you to save someone's time, paying for someone's bus fare when they are out of change, or meal when their wallets are dry. It does battle with the mind that ultimately all these contradicts with the very goal of saving and thus spontaneous kindness is difficult. But once we taste appreciation, its every penny worth it. I was teaching in Sunday School years back and a kid from another class had a tape on his crooked spectacles from falling apart. I asked him why and he said he knew his dad would not buy a new one for his careless accident. The next week, I took that boy and his friend for a drink and we stopped by the optician and ordered a new pair of student budget glasses. He got a good vision and a smarter image. I no longer see him or know what he is currently doing, but his smile was worth every penny. Though, back then, it was not spontaneous either and I could have missed the chance if he had not came the following week.

Readers, please do share any success stories on instilling spontaneous kindness?

(Photos show the Museum Louvre and the Louvre Palace and the Tuileries Garden next to it).