Tip 252: Eat a work of art

As I enter Tanjung Pagar Complex, a hawker center in Singapore, even from a distance I can hear the sound of wok clanging. It is however but from one stall that echoes through the whole complex.

The cook is dedicated to ensure every single strand of noodle of his char kway teow dish is fried evenly as he tosses and turns the noodles. Even when there is a long queue of customers, it does not stop him from concentrating on his craft on each and every plate cooked to perfection. He does not believe in cooking a few dishes together in one wok, even when the wok is large enough or if certain customers order the same dish.

While I am unsure if this is the best char kway teow stall in Singapore, I certainly appreciate every ounce of dedication put into the noodles. The blend of prawns, oil, egg, Chinese sausage and chili absorbs evenly into the noodles, together with a simmer of lime makes it just right for my palate - the umami after taste. For SGD2.50 a dish, his passion is beyond monetary value.

Another place I enjoy appreciating a work of fine craftsmanship in food is at the Jalan Berseh Ice Kachang (shaved ice) stall. The owner is a humble man who does not believe in placing awards at his stall, even when he has a steady flow of customers when he starts opening the stall at noon. He has a winning ice shaver machine that shaves the finest ice I have ever tasted. If I could be his consultant, I will re-brand his SGD1.20 ice kachang to Snow Ice delights and charge double or triple the price as its a differentiator from the rest :)

But, again the best dishes do not depend on a wok or a machine. The attention to detail rest in how his hand churns the bowl to precisely capture the shaved ice and how he garnishes this dessert with the right amount of milk, syrup and other condiments such as corn, red beans, kidney beans and attap chee.

After a few visits, I was curious on the secret of the distinct aromatic taste of the syrup. It has the right level of sweetness and a natural taste to it. I enquired from the owner and he said he does not buy it from suppliers, but makes the syrup from natural ingredients. This must be the reason many customers can taste the difference and even after the lunch time crowd leaves, this is the only dessert stall that never stops churning its machine.

Only between 5-8pm, I can get this refreshing desert quick enough to relieve the stress of work. As I ponder upon such excellent workmanship, I aspire to plan for my next day’s work with hopefully the same rigor, passion and drive to excellence and craftsmanship as these two cooks.

(Top photo is the Penang Style variant while second is black sauce Seafood Char Kway Teow from second floor of Tanjung Pagar Complex on top of the market. Next is the ice kachang at Jalan Berseh Food Center. Sayaka's first swimming pool experience was during her first church camp held at Palm Resort Le Grandeur Hotel, Senai Johor).

Tip 251: Chiropractic for kids

I was joining my wife with the kids for her regular visit to the chiropractor. Then, I decided to have a chat with the chiropractor about my kids and thought of seeking his view about kid's balance and athletic nature.

Previously, I wrote about Haruka being less athletic and in my observations, I try to encourage her to be more active by running with her.

She received her pre-school report card about her physical education participation. She did not get the best score for balance, hoping on 1 leg and a few other coordinated moves.

As I reflect, it could possibly be due to a phobia she still harboured or maybe she is just born with a personality that values being safe, careful and attempting all actions methodically. In attempting a flight of staircase, she would prefer to step one by one, instead of skipping a few in a daring jump. As parents, it helps to note this to make any remedial actions.

The chiropractor did a check on her spine and nerves and mentioned that there could be a slight disproportionate weight on one side of her body. According to him, this can affect the organ that is instrumental in achieving balance for the kid.

Nothing serious, but he did a few adjustments and said it should do the trick. While, I am not too hopeful, but believes that early intervention through observation of your child and encouraging them to play in the outdoors can improve many weaknesses for the best possible outcome.

(Photos show Haruka at her kindergarten, during a joint class performance and at the church Sunday School performance).

Tip 250: Running with your child

Most of us assume that kids love to play and run around. Yes they do. But, these days, they may not push their physical boundaries more than they could, considering the comfortable home they live in and the many attractive toys available at home. If we do not keep an eye on their physical fitness or provide motivations to enjoy the outdoors, they may begin to develop the habit of being less athletic or even be a couch potato.

We certainly can't expect all kids to be athletic. Part of it is in their genes. Another in their personality preferences. Yet, in today's modern lifestyle, are kids spending more time at home than in the outdoors? Do they find it too hot out in the sun or too tiring when it involves a little bit of running?

I was practising for a run and thought I would invite Haruka along at an enclosed field that is safe. While I outran her as I was keeping time, I kept watching her. It turned out quite productive. She did try her best to run fast and for quite a long distance which she usually wouldn't. When she was walking while taking a rest, she would observe the flowers around the field. She ran twice around the field, covering at least 1km in 30 minutes. I am proud of my 3 years old daughter as she joined me in my run a few times. She isn't too athletic by nature, but these activities together with dad can boost her esteem and keep her active.

(Photos show the girls at the Henderson Waves bridge that connect 2 parks making it an enjoyable nature trail, at the Jewel Box Mount Faber and me at the Osim 2011 Triathlon at Singapore).

Tip 249: Learning right/wrong early

It is amazing how innocent a baby is. They smile in their sleep so often. They have no worries or cares. Occasionally, they do of course cry for milk, but they have no concern whatsoever. Yet, I believe this begins to change when they begin to recognize their parents and develop an attachment towards them.

The baby's self identity begins to develop as they understand the concept of self and others, as well as the close family circle who cares for them more lovingly. Their curiosity develops and so will the ability to discern right and wrong. The first sense of right and wrong is when the baby decides what is the right or dangerous position to avoid pain or to enjoy comfort. The baby will try out different positions and learn its surroundings and understand its pain receptors. As they esteem their parents who feed them, they begin to attribute trust if their parents will further teach them how to enjoy more comfort or avoid danger.

The crucial window to teach right and wrong starts when the baby observes you and develops trust. This I believe can happen as early as 4 months old. The baby may not respond to any teaching, but they may remember. Start by teaching a body language for yes or of approval, such as by nodding your head and smile. For negative or undesirable behaviour, shake your head, frown or signal your finger or palm to demonstrate disapproval. Do this whenever you want to encourage or discourage a certain behaviour.

You can try it when the baby cries or when the baby wants to taste a certain food even if the baby seem not to understand. When you start using these body languages early, the baby will have already learnt them. When it comes to the time when the baby crawls, these body languages will be very useful to discourage the baby from going to certain areas. Or when the baby wants milk or food, they could express it to you by herself even if she does not speak yet.

I was pleasantly impressed one day when Sayaka at 6 months old, nods her head when she saw me eating a banana. By being able to express herself, her self esteem improves as she feels happy being able to communicate even without speaking or developing a vocabulary yet other than papa or mama.

She also begins to associate the word No as opposite to Yes, and would stop any undesirable behaviour slowly when I begin to express disapproval. When daddy can communicate with baby, it is the best feeling ever.

(Photos show the girls at a birthday party, scenes from the Singapore Art Museum and Sayaka's first mirror room experience there).

Tip 248: Invisible hand that protects

I am thrilled to be part of 8 months old Sayaka's developments. It is the same too for Haruka. Just that it feels like a new beginning again whenever you are involved in caring for a baby.

There is always so much awe and marvel at how babies challenge their growth boundaries and explore into the next level of learning. This is especially so if you are actively there with your baby and letting go of your fear, but lovingly prompt the baby to explore their potential. Even though the hand is not there holding the baby every step and movement, the hand is always ready. There is also a strong element of faith that the baby will be fine and even do better if daddy lets her explore, while keeping an eye on her. This is exactly how our Father in Heaven watches over us. God has immense love for each of us and never leaves us alone. Yet, many times, we are allowed to test the boundaries when we have developed the necessary resilience to survive hardships and temptations. By not restricting our freedom, we learn on our own our mistakes and understand love and grow stronger.

Same goes for Sayaka. I may be an extremely bold daddy. I would let her sit up on her own even if there is a risk of her falling.

I have watched over her before and knew of her steady ability to balance herself and not fall. I know that even if she falls, it is within a height that is safe for her to incur just some minor pain.

When I am at a public place, others would look with disbelief or worry if the small baby would hurt herself if she falls. Yet, I let her on her own.

It is amazing that by doing so, she is learning so much more quicker. Her bone structure strengthens faster and she develops a firmer posture.

If I had over protected her, she may not have such an opportunity to develop her posture and strength. I wonder if she feels my invisible hand such that I feel His.

(Photos show the girls at the Singapore Botanical Garden and the Singapore Art Museum).

Tip 247: Playing in multiracial playground

I blogged about how this world is intrinsically global. It was created to be a global world, then through disobedience and pride of man, God allowed discord through the desire to create different languages during the era of the Tower of Babel. Yet, through education and experiences of cooperation between cultures and nations, we are moving towards overcoming hurdles that set us apart. Similarly, daddies ought to encourage their children to develop a sense of acceptance of other races even at a young age.














It can be amusing to watch on TV or listen to the conversations of foreigners who speak different languages. Yet, it is a different reality altogether to live and play together with a foreign person of a different skin color who speaks a foreign language. The more exposure, the more understanding of the differences between each other. Then, the child learns to accept or reconcile any wrong perceptions held earlier.














I blogged previously about being careful with our body language when we meet a person of a different race. We just need to frown or be startled and our little children will sense that vibe in us. Before long, they would also internalize the same body language and inhibitions when meeting people of different color and languages. We often do not blame ourselves for this subtle habits, but it actually sow seeds of discord.














I was at a new playground and Haruka was eager to check out the new slides. An Indian mother was close to me and felt uneasy if a young father like me might feel uneasy with her presence. I smiled and invited her to sit next to me in case she wanted to. Later, as her Indian children played, Haruka smiled at them and watched from a distance. Then, she approached nearer and began to play ball with the Indian children. These were strangers from another housing neighbourhood, yet Haruka has possibly gotten the silent encouragement from daddy to be friendly and enjoy the moment.














(Photos show Sayaka at 5 months old and 2 weeks old when my mum visited).

Tip 246: How much attention is enough?

The older generation used to say that giving too much attention to a baby spoils the child. The older generation had less time for their children as they had more children in the family and more manual tasks to do each day to be constantly bothered about giving attention to their children. Yet, children's development in this generation have accelerated and their intelligence increasing due to enhanced motivation and availability of learning aids at a young age. Should we then make a conscious effort to start our babies earlier than usual in their learning? More importantly, should we be giving attention even when the child is yet to learn?














I was spending some time with 4 month old Sayaka by smiling and making funny faces at her. She would smile or giggle whenever she sees me. Due to the constant attention she enjoys receiving, she is alert and constantly scans around to look for company. She is able to turn her head around with her strong neck (due to my rough handling of her in her young age, but she does has a strong bone structure as well). Plus, she now rolls over on her chest and kicks the surface to maneuver around in different directions. I thought of trying out the song and tickle routine of round and round the garden. To my amazement, she giggled when I tickled her. She also anticipated the tickling after I tried the routine a few times. I checked my previous blog entry and realized I only started doing this to Haruka at 6 months old, while the children's guidebook recommends introducing this after age 1 year old. Sayaka does make noise and cry when she does not sense anyone around her. Sometimes, I leave her alone and after a while, she sleeps while sucking her thumb. A baby does crave for attention when it is given to her. Yet she needs to learn how to amuse herself or be contented with looking around her surroundings. I believe there is a time for everything and we need to expose the child to different situations. Constant attention may need to be reduced when the child is beginning to be too demanding. Like the Central Bank who needs to constantly adjust interest rates based on the economic situation of the country, a daddy needs to adjust between excessive attention and just the right amount of motivation to stir curiosity in the child. If the Central Bank increases the interest rates by too large a quantum or too frequently than necessary, the market overheats. Hence daddy needs to be constantly present to assess the situation to ensure a well balanced and sustainable child. Intelligence and talent isn't everything.














(Photos show Sayaka at 4 months old).