Tip 208: To love is to Remember

As I reflect on life and on my relationship with God and others, I realize that the act of remembering has life changing and powerful impact in one's life. Sometimes, even if the act of remembering does not result in significant good actions on our part to recipocrate and do good works to repay the debt we received from the giver, it is fine to just remember. I blogged once about the importance of remembering God while we were young. I am beginning to inculcate this to Haruka even as she is just 2 years old. Though, the concept of remembering may have little to do with how strong our memory is. It helps to have good memory to remember the details of location, time and date and people involved in our history who have helped us. Yet, it takes more than contemplation, as gratitude may be a function of how we value kindness.














I would always talk to Haruka and ask her if she remembers a certain person and relates the incident and location. Then, I would ask her what that person did and if she loved that person.












It is the lunar Chinese New Year soon. I am preparing red packet 'angpow'. When I was away from the chinese community in Tokyo and London during Chinese New Year, there were fewer friends and relatives that I would need to prepare an angpow for. So this coming Chinese New Year will be an exciting one for me and for Haruka. It will be Haruka's first time receiving angpows as we somehow got distracted with travelling or were busy with work during the previous new year. After all, it is not a holiday in Japan. As I prepare angpows, I remembered my church members who would look out for me during church services during Chinese New Year as they have prepared a RM10 angpow for me. It may not be a big amount now, but its a generous amount for non relatives to be giving a RM10 angpow to a church member and I remembered everyone of them for their dedication, generosity and love shared many years during my childhood. Now that I attend a Japanese church in Singapore, I realized that there aren't too many children who would find a SGD10 or even SGD20 angpow as meaningful to be remembered for, even if I would stick to a routine of doing the same every year. Probably most churches in the city would face the same situation. So what do we do? Do I make a trip to a poor neighbourhood village or to the aborigines at Cameron Highlands to give out angpows every year? Or do I keep a prayerful eye for a needy family in a Malaysian church to share this ritual of love?

Somebody asked Abba Antony (St. Antony the Great of Egypt), "What shall I do in order to please God?"












He replied, “Do what I tell you, which is this: wherever you go, keep God in mind; whatever you do, follow the example of Holy Scripture; wherever you are, stay there and do not move away in a hurry. If you keep to these guidelines, you will be saved.”












We are living in a fast paced results oriented materialistic society. It is becoming harder to pass through the eye of a needle and appreciate the love that God has for us and share that same love to others. Yet, we need to remember. Sometimes, it may mean not being in a hurry always. Find time to remember.

(Photos show Haruka at the Singapore Botanic Gardens and a shopping mall lantern display).

Tip 207: Save first, enjoy later

The story of capitalism has seen many enjoy great material comfort and luxury, only to lose it within a day.















I watched The Oprah Winfrey Show which showcased a TV anchorman who lived a celebrity life only to suddenly lose his job after 26 years when his TV station closed down abruptly. The next month, the anchorman had 0 income, but 2 mortgages to pay off and a lot of other installment plans such as holiday hotel timeshare plans, 24 month fitness gym subscription, kids' university fees, insurance plans, regular savings investment plans and many others. From a life of cocktail parties every other night, he had to resort to search for a job instantly and decided to take a 80% pay cut to be a part timer at a pet shop.















He had to surrender many of his investment plans and incur losses, sell off assets at a loss and resort to rent a home and car instead. All the years of hard work to build his wealth results to nothing when he incurs great loss when selling his assets and investments abruptly.















Unlike Asians, many do not keep large savings for rainy days. The solution: save 1 year of income before committing to any new mortgage or large ticket expense.















As I look back, I can understand the temptations to enjoy or over invest beyond our means. The sales person who want get you to spend on gym expenses, will sell you a 24 month plan and share with you the discounts you may enjoy. Yet, you may later find yourself moving to another city or country and not utilizing the membership after all. Similarly, insurance agents or investment brokers may give various incentives that may tempt customers to invest beyond their means.















What is the optimum path to manage money to live a good life? God first, people second, then money, then things. Delay our craving on things till we manage money well for a good sustainable future in today's volatile fast changing world. After a while, we may realize things can matter very little.














(Photos show Haruka a little unhappy to pose with a Black Pete (Zwarte Piet, Sinterklaas's helper) during the Dutch Christmas event Sinterklaas feast at the Hollandse Club, at a playground at the Harbour Front mall, along the Christmas lights at Orchard Road and a Christmas party at a home of a Japanese Christian of the church we are joining now in Singapore).