Tip 84: Face expressions can spur learning

I have been encouraged by Haruka's increasing cheerfulness, friendliness and good behavior in public. I think its partly due to her being aware of facial expressions since being a young baby. While playing with her since young, I was constantly exaggerating my expressions to the extent of being a clown. I smile a lot, laugh when she trips or falls to develop her sense of humor, claps my hands everytime there is some happy occasion and Tomomi carries Haruka to the door so I can kiss my wife and baby every morning before I go to work. This makes Haruka a good observer of facial expressions and actions of others. She would smile and wave to others when someone looks at her, smiles at her and waves at her. While there are crowds of people standing in the train or walking around her (since Tokyo is of course a dense city), Haruka would know that those other people are not communicating to her. But she is quick to spot a smile and respond back to receive more attention and praises from others. Hence, she does not get bored and grouchy in the company of friends, unless she is very tired or hungry.

I realised the following can stir up humor as the baby can relate to such funny expressions.

Sneeze and fall off the chair or fall on the bed.

Pretend to be sleepy and keep dosing off and suddenly be startled and awaken a few time as you knock your head on a wall or fall of a chair.

Begin to hiccup and show irritation of it.

All of a sudden, jump up and do a Funny Dance of rigorous hand and leg movements.

Can you think of any more? Do daddies need to be strict and quiet or funny and interesting? What say you? Yes, there needs to be a season for everything, the need for discipline and encouragement. But which is more important?
(Photos all show Haruka at 8 months old)

Tip 83: Surviving a recession S.A.V.E.

Alan Greenspan said that the current financial credit crunch in the USA is a "once in a a half century, probably once in a century type of event — the worst by far" in his lifetime. In my opinion, due to the greed of men (through corporate organization's goals of profit maximizing and done in the interest of demanding shareholders), large wealth was created and often through high leverage (or excessive borrowing through issuing of debts globally!). So these causes a domino effect of many banks around the world losing their money when many large corporations fail due to the sharp drop of property prices. It may however be less dramatic than the Great Depression in 1929 that lasted 10 years. The wealth of the world today is more diversified along different asset classes. Many among the wealthy have portfolios of gold should the world's currencies and properties decline, thus preserving their wealth. There is also more mobility to greener pastures should a terrible drought hit USA again such as during the Great Depression. Central banks have large reserves and better diplomacy than half a century ago, as they can now depend on other countries to issue emergency financing should a disastrous financial crisis threaten the rest of the world to sink in a Great Depression. But nevertheless, there are several steps to prepare for a recession before its too late. Especially when one is a daddy and have huge family commitments. Of course, financial decisions are personal choices but I found some articles that could be relevant to most people at here and here.

Just as I shared principles of R.I.C.H., here is another acronym I coined up myself. To survive a recession is the best time for S.A.V.E. (Spendless, Accumulate, Vocation, Emergency fund). A recession is certainly a time to control spending through effective budgeting. This site has many ideas but it boils down to sitting down, evaluating your spending habits and making decisions to save on the unnecessary until the storm has cleared and the rainbow is in sight. For instance, I do make it a point to only go out for dinners on special occasions as its much cheaper at restaurants during lunch time, but I am recently contemplating packing lunch from home once a week. It just feels uncomfortable making that change in habit and I will blog more about this resolution. Accumulating assets only during recessions is certainly another good financial wisdom that require lots of patience. If one has saved a lifetime to buy low, recessions are the time when you can negotiate a good deal, and often times, you make the best decisions as you are not following the herd, but taking a contrarian stand, exercising extra caution. But, another area requiring caution is the workplace or business (if you are self employed). Recession is certainly a time to be working hard to maintain one's position to ensure constant income flow. For me, I took one step further to saying yes for extra projects outside work. Currently, I am actively engaged with free lance research for companies entering the Japanese market and these projects provide an additional USD$1500-8000 per project. Of course, the need to sacrifice weekends and rest. Other opportunities exist in teaching, blogging or other means of introducing services to others. Besides extra jobs is the need to be linked with the right recruiters. Finally, this site shares the need to grow your emergency fund that can last you for 1 year without job and with rising prices. With this in mind, I have recently separated my fixed term deposits into various terms maturing at different dates so I have the option of cashing some of them quickly. I got into a few new fixed term AUD deposits at attractive exchange rates when AUD$ sank to 83/yen, though these are somewhat illiquid with current market volatility and hence the need to exercise more caution. Above all, recessions are best times to take stock of your life, be thankful to God, seek ways to offer help to others and seek clearer directions as the busyness subsides. The earth needs to rest after all the massive overdevelopment and so do we.

What do you think of the above principles? Any other tips to weather the storm? Whats your outlook and would it be the meltdown of the century?

Tip 82: Brown rice with barley recipe to live above 100 yrs

Today is a holiday in Japan called Respect for the Aged Day. Many would know that Japan has one of the highest life's expectancy rate in the world for both male and female. In many countries, you get certain senior citizen benefits at age 55 or 60, but the ex Japanese PM, Junichiro Koizumi said that age 60 is not considered old anymore. Every man in Japan has a 54% chance of living above 80 years young and women a 75.3% chance. Here are more statistics... the number of Japanese aged 100 and beyond was 10,000 in 1998, 36,276 currently and is expected to reach 1 million by 2050 and be the world's largest even for a nation with a relatively small population. Okinawa (Tomomi's hometown) has the highest number of centenarians, 61 out of every 100,000 people, which is far above the Japanese national average of 28 per 100,000. In Tokyo, its 25 per 100,000, while in the USA, its just 10 per 100,000. So what is the secret for living till a good old age? Its food, exercise and a government firm on food safety and low crime rates.















I am not picky about what food I eat and when Tomomi decided it has to be Brown rice, I have no arguments besides the cost of it. But there is surely no price tag to good health. Not many Japanese households do this, but Tomomi adds barley, green and red beans into the claypot of brown rice she cooks for me daily. It does not change the taste of the rice too much, but it certainly adds a rich chewy texture to it. This is something that is easy to try, yet reaps immense health benefits. Japanese diet is also very much low in fat and even if I have a taste of well fried tempura, its usually with clean oil and not recycled oil. Of course I miss the Malaysian char kway teow or Hokkien stir fried dark char mee with lots of oily pork lard but having it only once a year is probably not so bad after all. Most Japanese dishes are cooked with not too much oil, less seasoning and tend to emphasize the quality of the freshly caught and naturally grown food, rather than its cooking style. Probably its the age in me to want to sacrifice the lust for oily food and choose naturally sweet and fresh tasty food instead. Kudos also to the government that constantly monitors food contamination besides the Japanese society's culture that would not want to be shamed for cheating. Adding to this healthy eating lifestyle, there is lots of walking and cycling in central Tokyo. Even if most people catch trains to work, they would need to walk long stretches of subway pathways to get out of the station, then head out to their offices. Its interesting that even when Japan is a developed country and the second largest economy in the world, the police still follow a disciplined schedule to patrol the streets, even along less busy residential sidewalks on their bicycles, rain or shine. The past decade of slow growth in Japan only humbled the Japanese to keep their bodies and minds working all the time and if a balance between stress and rest is achieved, the Japanese hold the recipe for living it young past 100. Of course, its not a perfect country and in other post I will talk about its limitations, but so far it has its track record for the oldest people living on the face of this earth.

I still would love to hear about any health tip you have. Any nutritious food we should start eating?

Tip 81: Holding hands again

During dating, men usually look forward to holding hands. They do it to express their love and it excites them when their cherished girlfriend responds positively. Hand holding is the stage before you kiss and men get excited that they are slowly moving up the intimacy ladder and getting accepted by their girlfriend. But why after marriage, the hand holding gets less? Married couples will have to admit that even if they still hold hands, the frequency has reduced, more so with the arrival of children. Let us take an example of a gardener watering his plants. In the beginning, there is so much excitement seeing the seed grow with a fragile plant sprouting out. There is so much yearning to nurture the plant to see its first flower. The plant receives her daily water and regular fertiliser without fail. But, the excitement slows after getting used to the first flower blooming. Not really, as an experienced gardener will tell you that with much patience, the excitement and joy grows when you see more flowers bloom at each spring. Marriage and family is not made up of only romantic feelings such as the gardening experience does not comprise only to see the first bloom, but it is comprised of much commitment, initiative, duty, sacrifice and perseverance to see each beautiful day together. And the more we hold hands, the more we remind ourselves of that. Besides, holding hands make the girl melt more than the guy usually ...

This blog tip title relates to the natural rhythm of relationships that we usually hold hands less after marriage. Having to carry my baby to lunch, I simply have no hands to hold another hand. Even Tomomi would ask me to concentrate on carrying Haruka well when Haruka was much younger. There is a danger I may just listen to Tomomi and soon, the hand holding gets rare. But, each of us have to remind ourselves that as much as we need to care for the baby, we need to also nurture our relationship. So in our 10 minute walk every weekend to the long row of restaurants near our home (maybe it takes 15 minutes with the baby), I remind myself to be holding hands and enjoying the walk. One hand on Haruka and another to Tomomi. Its amazing that without a car, there are more opportunities to enjoy a walk together. Its a magical touch as many daddies do not realize what magic it does to mummy, especially done regularly after marriage. So free up just 1 of your hands daddies, and see the good returns it reaps to your relationship, and better dinners to come. :)

Love to hear my readers share. Daddies and mummies have you noticed if the hand holding has gottten less after marriage? Daddies, any tips on hand holding and noticed any good results after hand holding? Mummies, do daddies have to take the initiative all the time? How about mummy doing her bit to reach for daddies' hand?

Tip 80: Getting involved in activities of the season

At the start of each season in Japan, there will be processions at many different cities and this promotes awareness to cherish the beautiful and uniqueness of each season. Japanese take the extra mile to catch the beautiful sights at the best places, even if it means spending more money or waiting in long queues. But, to a certain extent, that's something we ought to consider doing. When the playcenter near my home organized Nagashi Soumen as part of it's summer activity for just 300 yen per person (USD$3), we seized the opportunity to let Haruka have her first Nagashi Soumen experience. She is too young to cherish this memory, but the photos and comments posted here can do that job.

Nagashi Soumen or floating/flowing noodles is usually done during summer as an outdoor activity where the soumen noodles are let to flow down a long flume of bamboo on cold water (sometimes ice cold). I had my first experience at a garden of a home in the company of adults aged 20 onwards. Its actually quite costly as you have to order a clean bamboo as you do not see any grow wild in Tokyo. The second experience was equally fun in the company of kids and mothers. There were some additional items besides the soumen which were quite a challenge to catch using a chopstick or fork such as the fast rolling baby tomatoes and mochi. Of course, I had to hold Haruka's hand the whole time and she probably did not know what was going on except the time when I put the items in her mouth. I am looking forward to try these activities again as Haruka grows older and with my future other children. Hopefully, God willing I would still have time to blog about them. And may all this blog post be a special present to my children of my love to them as well as a testament of how much fun I put into parenting in the midst of the sweat and commitments as well.

Are there any fun activities related to seasons and cultural festivals that you do with your children? Do share them on the comment section.

Tip 79: 1 way to put your baby to sleep

I have always been doing this but did not realize its a trademark daddy thing that got many mummies jealous of me. I was in the playcenter on a Saturday with Haruka. After lunch with Tomomi, I gave her a break to go to the bookshop or to do some shopping while I took Haruka to the playcenter. This is a government playcenter and its only 2000 yen (USD$20) fee annually since its heavily subsidised, but the parent can not leave the place but must be there with the child at the playcenter. After Haruka played for 2 hours, she got grouchy and I carried her and within 5 minutes, she slept on my arm. I took her to the bed at the playcenter room, put her down on the bed and she cried missing daddy's strong warm arms. The mummies watched me as I found a soft toy as padding for Haruka's head and made her comfortable. Then, with my index finger, I made circular motions on her head and within 5 seconds, her crying tapered off and she slept! All mummies around were surprised! That was 1 day of fame of a daddy magician trick. Interestingly no other mummy knew about this tip. Have you tried this?

That story did not end there. I went home and forgot about it. But Tomomi went to the playcenter on Tuesday and the mummies told her what a dedicated and caring daddy that I am with such special skills. It probably put a tear on Tomomi as she was extra kind to me for the next few days, cooking good meals and other things and being extra gentle and nice. :) So, that's a bonus tip here - do some special contribution without intentions of magnifying it, but if its in the presence of mummies who would get impressed, they would tell your wife about it sincerely. And that's going to reward you handsomely more than any rose in the world. Apparently, Japanese daddies are afraid of babies, thinking they would hurt the small child and leave all the babysitting work to mummies. So the act of knowing how to make the baby sleep is a rare magician trick.

Daddies, any more magician tricks to share? We need more of this to save on roses.